Sunday, October 11, 2009

Such Sweet Sorrow

The pain of losing someone, at least for me, is deeply personal; not only in its obvious meaning but in some odd and not completely out of place egotistical way. It is losing, not gaining; it is the end of a potential, not the beginning. Regrets, sometimes overlooked, surface with a violent vengeance and guilt strikes to the core.

It is the end of the world, the inner world, as we know it. But endings and beginnings come and go every day; death is final.

And what do we really know of our loved ones, our feelings towards them and even ourselves? More and more I agree with Joni Mitchell that it is "life's illusions I recall; I really don't know life at all". It is the shattering of those illusions, our conceptions, misguided hopes, that hurts the most.


Joni Mitchell - Both Sides Now {video}


grace said...

I'm so there with you. I just lost a couple of very close family members in September, and have seen/experienced many sides of the process...the joy in the family coming together, the sorrow of the loss, the realization of how many people these people have actually's overwhelming, but not an experience I would trade easily. peace

grace said...

I'm really with you on that. Last month I lost 2 of my family members, which is more than I ever have in my life. I really have experienced many sides of the loss- the amazing moments with family, the sorrow, the questioning and re-evaluation of my life...None of us are immune from the experience, though I wouldn't trade it for anything. I know I've grown and will continue to grow from it. Peace

Oded said...

Thanks for your comment and I'm sorry for your loss. Growth often comes through pain, it seems, and I hope to deal with the situation and my feelings as best I can. I try not to suppress it on one hand or dwell in it on the other hand, an interesting little balancing act.

Johnny said...

Losing someone who is close has got to be one of the hardest things to get through in life. Thanks for the post